7 Ways to Grow Your Marriage During COVID

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his last week has been insane. I feel like I woke up on Friday last week and the world had started to end. Grocery stores were being emptied, in-person church services had been canceled, schools were closed, and my graduate program was put on hold…and I couldn’t find a single darn roll of toilet paper.

The feeling was surreal.

I almost feel as if I’ve been placed inside a movie or TV show. I’m waiting for someone to come up to me and say “Just kidding! You’ve been pranked!”

Adam and I were laying in bed the other night and we started talking about this sudden pandemic. I had been reading the news and watching the briefings from the White House, so I had quite a bit of information to share. I could see Adam’s eyes getting bigger and bigger the more words came out of my mouth.

I quietly asked him, “Are you scared?”

He looked at me and said “Well, I wasn’t. But now I am a bit”.

Fear is contagious and spreads quickly.

Not that we shouldn’t be talking about our fears with our spouse, but we do need to keep perspective and not allow fear to overtake our lives.

Is this pandemic scary? Yes, absolutely.

BUT, we have an incredible opportunity here to center ourselves on the Lord and intimately bond with our spouse.

So, with that being said, what are some ways to not only protect our home and our marriage from the growing fear and uncertainty, but thrive through this difficult time?

  1. Pray as a couple and bring your fears to God
  2. There are some very practical things that we need to be praying for right now. Pray fervently as a couple for your home, for your family, for our leaders, for our churches, for our economy, and for our communities.

    Praying will center our hearts on the TRUE Provider, recognizing that He is ultimately the one in control, not this virus, the fear, or even our elected officials. (Remember that Romans 13:1 says, “Let everyone be subject to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.”)

  3. Have fun together
  4. With this being such a stressful time, make sure you are playing and laughing together. This helps relieve tension and bring some much needed relief.

    Play games, binge watch a fun show on Netflix or Disney Plus, bake together, cook together, color in a coloring book together, have a water gun fight in the house… Now is the time to get creative and be playful. 🙂

  5. Be the church
  6. If you and your spouse are healthy and are able to help, check in with your church, friends, and neighbors for ways you can serve.

    Where can you show the love of Jesus? Can you pick up groceries for someone who can’t go? Can you spare some toilet paper? Can you make cookies and drop them off on your neighbor’s doorstep?

    While fear says this is a time to be selfish and hoard, love says this is a time to be selfless and give.

  7. Have grace
  8. Tensions are high and fear is creeping in. Give yourself and your spouse grace in the midst of frustrations and disagreements.

  9. Stay connected
  10. Friends and family are so important to the health of a marriage. While we may need to distance ourselves physically, we shouldn’t distance ourselves emotionally. Call your family and friends regularly, have dinner with friends over Facetime or Skype, or send a letter. Take advantage of the incredible technology we have!

  11. Memorize scripture together
  12. Ground yourselves on God’s promises. In the midst of everything, He is in control.

    Here are some great verses to get you started:

    • “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” – Isaiah 41:10
    • “When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.” – Psalm 56:3
    • “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” – Philippians 4:6-7
    • “Peace is what I leave with you; it is my own peace that I give you. I do not give it as the world does. Do not be worried and upset; do not be afraid.” – John 14:27
  13. Embrace the unexpected
  14. These past weeks and future weeks have been filled with and will be filled with so much unexpected. Accept that you don’t have control. As we are in survival mode, life will look different every day. Work together as a team through the unexpected.

In the midst of situations like the COVID virus pandemic, the worst thing we can do is to wander aimlessly. Actively pursue your spouse and the Lord over these weeks and months and you’ll have a stronger relationship because of it.

How are you and your spouse doing in this stressful time? Have you been honest with each other about what you’re feeling? Do you have anything you’d like to add to the list?

Want to dig deeper?

Check out Radiant Marriage Academy, our free 16-lesson course!


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adam & Jess

Hi, we’re Adam & Jess--we’re so glad you’re here!

Our marriage got off to a rocky start in 2014 and quickly escalated into a full-out crisis. God healed us, and now we're inviting you to walk with us as we all journey toward healthier marriages together!

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