This is the second part of a two-part series on money. Check out Part 1 here: Money Matters: How to Talk about Money Without an Argument One of the more difficult steps early in marriage is working to combine finances and spending styles. We’re strong advocates of all money being shared in joint accounts. But that brings the task of spending responsibly as a team, and the best way to start that is with a budget. Now many people have a “budget” where they don’t pay much attention to what … [Read more...]
Money Matters: How to Talk about Money Without an Argument
This is the first part of a two-part series on money. Part 2 is available here: Money Matters: How to Build a Functional Budget as a Team One of the biggest topics of conflict in marriage is money. When you combine two lives and two established financial styles that can be vastly different, it’s really no surprise. But how do we work together to overcome the struggle and start to have productive conversations about OUR money? When it comes to handling money, there are two personality … [Read more...]
Pillow Talk: 11 Secrets to a Great Sex Life
Let’s talk about sex. If you asked me before I got married, I would have told you that one of the things I was most excited for was sex. I couldn’t wait to be connected to Adam in such an intimate way. I thought our honeymoon was going to just be us in our hotel room the whole time. During and after our honeymoon, however, I found sex to be overwhelming, awkward, disappointing, and honestly, just really difficult. Five years later and my tune has completely changed. I enjoy sex and look … [Read more...]
5 Reasons to Praise Your Spouse
When was the last time you received a kind word? How did it make you feel? Praise is something we all like to receive, even if we’re a bit sheepish about it sometimes. It’s no different in a marriage-- in fact, it’s just as important to praise your spouse whether or not they can hear you. “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen” (Ephesians 4:29). When we speak well … [Read more...]
Hold the Phone: How to Keep Technology from Taking Over Your Marriage
Family movie night. We usually have a movie night once a week, but this week something struck me. We were sitting in front of the tv watching the film, but our faces were buried in our phone or tablet while the movie was playing. Breakfast table. We sit down to eat breakfast and both have our phones sitting on the table. When the conversation has a lull or we feel bored, we can just pull up the screen on our phone to fill the silence as we munch on a piece of toast. Do either of these … [Read more...]
Pursuing God’s Will Together in the Midst of Big Decisions
Have you ever had to make a major decision in your life? In the midst of these decisions, it can be so easy to try to make them on our own. I’ve had many conversations with people where they talk a lot about what they’re going to do, but don’t bring God to the center of their decision process. At some point along the way, I usually ask, “Have you thought that God might be leading you in a specific direction? Are you willing to follow Him even if it’s in a different direction than where you want … [Read more...]
Meeting the Man Behind the Mask
Masks take many forms. From ornately decorated masquerade-style masks to the air-purifying masks that firefighters use to surgical masks, they all have but one purpose: to cause separation between the wearer and their environment. Sometimes it’s to protect the wearer from something harmful (as in the case of the firefighter being protected from smoke), and other times it’s to protect the world from something harmful inside us (as with surgical masks preventing doctors from sharing germs with … [Read more...]
Offering Grace to an Undeserving Spouse
There I was, sitting on our bed, having just torn into Adam to a degree that I am now thoroughly embarrassed by. I completely lost it. The two of us sat there as I gave a proud and half-hearted apology. This was not an apology worth accepting. I completely deserved for Adam to lash into me. I completely deserved for him to push me away. Instead, he calmly listened to me and accepted that ridiculous half-hearted apology. He then took me in his arms and hugged me and told me he loved me. I … [Read more...]
Combating an Autopilot Marriage
It's been said that our bank account and our calendar show where our priorities lie. Does your calendar reflect that your marriage is a priority? So many people go forward in life assuming they have decades to go. It’s easy to get into a “We’ll fix it when we have time” mentality, but this type of thinking can be toxic in marriage. Here are a few steps you can take to be proactive in your marriage: Avoid procrastinating So many times we find ourselves in a difficult season. It’s easy … [Read more...]
How to Fight Well With Your Spouse
What if I were to tell you that arguing with your spouse is a good thing? Would you think I was crazy? I’m sure a lot of you would say, “YES!” Believe it or not, arguments, when handled well, can actually enrich relationships. Working through disagreements in a respectful way fights for your marriage rather than your own personal gain. Fighting with honor and respect builds trust. Conflict in marriage is inevitable. We are different human beings with different thought processes and … [Read more...]