Did you know that there’s a honeymoon period after a couple gets married that usually lasts one or two years? The honeymoon stage is so much fun and it’s easy to intentionally pursue our spouse when the butterflies are there. The problem is that the transition from infatuation to disconnection can happen so slowly we don’t even realize it. On today’s episode, we dive into why being intentional and keeping a strategic mentality is vital to a thriving marriage. By being intentional and … [Read more...]
#16: Combating the Enemy as a Team
You ready for a BIG truth? The enemy wants to destroy your marriage. As a united team, you pose a threat. Separately, you're less of a threat. His mission is to separate you and your spouse by enhancing feelings of shame, guilt, and pride. On today’s podcast, we talk about how destructive the “DIY” mentality can be with marriage, and dive into HOW to keep your marriage strong, combating the enemy from an offensive position. Let’s do this. #16: Combating the Enemy as a … [Read more...]
4 Powerful Biblical Truths about Marriage
W hen we first get married, everything seems perfect. It seems as if the love that we share will sustain us. It seems as if we will be able to work through any argument with ease, that the butterflies will never fade, and our spouse will never be able to let us down. If you’ve been married any length of time, you know that this just isn’t the case. Marriage is wonderful and beautiful, but that beauty takes work. To have an intimate marriage that reflects the love of Jesus, we have to deal … [Read more...]
7 Steps to Achieve Best-Friend Status with your Spouse
O ne of the most profound things I have ever heard was the idea that after 30, 50, or 70 years together, we hopefully will not only still love our spouse, but still like them too. This idea really caught me off guard the first time I heard it. Wouldn’t the goal be to love our spouse? Isn’t liking them natural and love more difficult? While the Bible calls us to love our spouse, we are not called to like them. “Liking” our spouse is a feeling, whereas “loving” them is a choice. And “liking” is … [Read more...]
#14: The Fear Trap
So, there we were in Idaho really frustrated with one another... We had been talking about moving out of California since we got married and dreaming specifically of Idaho for the last 6 months. We were finally in Idaho to check it out and we were finding that we weren’t on the same page. We were both scared and polarizing each other in the process. What if we couldn’t get on the same page? What if Idaho wasn’t the place we both wanted to move? What if we had to start the process ALL over … [Read more...]
Confronting Our Sin and Wrestling with Responsibility
There we were in the middle of one of the biggest fights we had had in a long time. Tensions were rising. Hurtful words were said. And I was desperately clutching to my pride. I feel things incredibly deeply... I think more deeply than most people. So when I begin to go down this road, resentment and bitterness set in quickly. And the longer I stay in this space, the longer it takes to step away from my judgemental, self-entitled attitude. In the middle of these times, I feel so justified … [Read more...]
Pillow Talk: God’s Design for Sex
I’ve often heard husbands using bible verses to guilt their wives into sex, saying that their wife isn’t following what the bible says if they don’t submit to them sexually. I’ve also heard of wives using sex (or the lack of) to punish or reward their husbands for being their definition of a good husband. When sex becomes selfish or manipulative, the results are disastrous, turning sex into something trivial and meaningless. But this isn’t God’s design. Sex is incredibly intimate and beautifully … [Read more...]
#11: Building a Christ-Centered Marriage
Any pastor will tell you that keeping Jesus at the center is the key to having a marriage that will stand the test of time. But why is that the case and what does that really look like? Today on the podcast we’ll dive into the reasons why having Jesus at the center is crucial to having a strong, intimate marriage and what that practically looks like. We had a great time recording this one and we are so excited for you to listen in! #11: Building a Christ-Centered Marriage Mentioned … [Read more...]
#10: Marriage Retreats: Breathing Life Into Your Marriage (Dr. Matt Turvey)
Today, we had the pleasure of talking with Dr. Matt Turvey, director of Winshape Marriage. He talks about how marriage retreats help to jumpstart the healing process for a couple that's struggling. They can also be a great way for a couple that's doing well to be proactive and breathe new life into their marriage, providing a solid foundation to continue building on. He has great wisdom and believes that couples need to actively address the little things before they become big wedges. His advice … [Read more...]
Choosing Thankfulness over Frustration
If you’ve read my previous blog, you know I tend to analyze things to death, often focusing solely on the flaws. After writing that blog, I saw another important lesson that I missed the first time. Not only do I often see the worst in myself, but I tend to see the worst in my wife far more often than I would like to admit. The same is true in many marriages--the little things grate on you after a while, then you have a choice to make--will you focus on the negative or the positive? I have … [Read more...]